Reveal Me by Sappharia Mayer

Author:Sappharia Mayer [Mayer, Sappharia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Eidyllio Publishing

Chapter Eighteen

For months I've dealt with insomnia, but there is something different this time. No amount of white noise or calming words can break me out of the need to twist and turn in the bed. I pace in front of the window, staring out into the dark, the white caps of the waves shimmering in the spotlights.

His words consumed my entire night. Any version of training makes nervousness race through me. I've been in the lifestyle for so long it should be second nature. Yet I find myself as giddy as a newbie about starting over while afraid of losing everything. Logic moves against emotions, and I sigh.

I grab my robe and walk down the hall to the kitchen. With practiced movements, I put the kettle on the stove. Thoughts spin as I try to make sense of why he wants the relationship to ‘restart’ as if I’m new. A time where the dance is about the structure needed to form respect. I wonder if I can open enough to trust. I wonder if he’ll be there to catch me when I fall.

The kettle whistles. I pour near boiling water over the Earl Grey teabag. There was a time when I loved the simple ritual of loose tea, but even that simple pleasure has escaped from my world.

The gray skies threaten my mood. With a shake of my head, I force the path of my thoughts to stop. Reece isn’t putting this path in front of me because I am inadequate; he’s doing it so I can find peace. When I look at it through a dominant lens, the one I use in most of my life, it makes far more sense. In many ways it is exactly how I would handle this situation. But when I let the buried parts stretch their legs and roam free, I find my emotions tenuous.

The crushing issues seep in and I feel alone.

I take a long sip of tea.

What will it be like to hand over the mantle of dominance? Is it even possible? Dominick formed me until my perspective was shaped to see the world in terms of power and control. A place where you either give or receive. The clear definition is more necessary in a business. What will it be like to force a change? Will he lead in a way which helps lift my world or will he find the task too onerous, leaving me under the crushing weight as it lands against my shoulders once more?

"I'm too old for this nonsense." My voice echoes off the kitchen walls.

“You are far from old.” Reece’s voice answers my statement. His tall frame steps out of the shadows. My eyes roam his bare chest, causing my breath to catch.

“Atlas.” He walks to me, brushing a light kiss across my forehead. “You are up early.”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“What’s wrong?” Concern laces his tone.

"Nothing. Things are fin... " The words die on my lips. My eyes drop and I gaze into the mug.

From the edge of my view, I see his eyebrows lift slightly.

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